Breaking His Vows
by Anti Inflammatory
Summary: :He's married to someone else. She was married to Michael. But they keep coming back to each  Other.  He can't seem to get her out of his mind.
1. Shower Stall

Title:Breaking His Vows

Rating: M for Mature Content

Disclaimer:I don't own the characters in this fic. Except One- Lexi, she's my character. The rest belong to NBC & ER.

Content Warning: Adult content, lots of sex. some foul language.

deals some with drugs and such. you've been warned.

Summary:He's married to someone else. She was married to Michael. But they keep coming back to each

Other.

He can't seem to get her out of his mind.

Note : Wrote is LONG time ago and its probably not my best work and probably OC character moments.

But never the less here were go.

Chapter 1: Shower Stall

Ray Barnett walked into his apartment around 5am or so he had just gotten in. He still needed to shower and get ready for his shift at County.

He headed for the bedroom finding a sight he could get used to, a small grin spread across his face. Sound asleep in the bed was his beautiful wife- Lexi. He couldn't resist as he went to the bed," Hey sexy beauty wake up," he whispered.

Lexi's green eyes opened slowly and focused on him," Hey," she murmured half asleep half awake.

"I couldn't resist baby," he said crawling into their bed and over to her.

She pretended to frown," I was asleep," she said with a pout.

He placed a soft kiss on her collarbone, " mmm that's too bad."

" Why?"

" Well," he mumbled against the skin of her neck, while moving the kisses upwards," I was about to take a shower before my shift."

" And you had to wake me for that?"

"Yes," came his muffled reply as he sucked on her neck softly," Because I figured you'd want to join me."

She couldn't help but smile," Mmmm, we-ell."

He chuckled," Come on you know you want to baby," he said taking her hand in his as he started to get up from their bed; and pulling her up with him walking backwards towards their bathroom. His hands slid down her sides as he pulled her body closer to his kissing her softly.

It didn't take long for her mind and body to wake up as she slid her hands beneath his black t-shirt, she kissed him back softly.

He started to deepen the kiss his tongue snaking out and brushing against her bottom lip, as they stumbled into their bathroom.

"Ray," Lexi gasped softly, finding it hard to breathe. He always took her breath away, and when he kissed her it was like no one else was in the room.

The sound of his name on her lips drove him wild as his fingers slid beneath the straps of her blank tank top. He began to slid the straps down her shoulders, breaking the kiss to place soft kisses on the exposed skin.

A small moan escaped her lips his mouth against her skin drove her wild.

He pulled the tank top down til it was bunched at her waist. His thumb ran across her right nipple, which hardened at his touch. He pushed her tank top down her hips.

As the black cotton slid down her legs she kicked it aside, while grabbing the bottom of his shirt pushing it upwards to remove it from his body.

He stopped what he was doing to help her remove his t-shirt tossing it in the general direction of where her tank top lay. They were in the bathroom now as he slid his hands down to her hips." How come I can never get enough of you?" he said as he untied the string on her Tinkerbell drawstring pajamas pulling them along with her pink bikini cut panties down her legs.

She smirked," I dunno, maybe because I'm so irresistible?" she said as she removed the rest of his clothing while stepping out of her own as he slid them down.

"Oh so you think you're irresistible huh?" he said backing away from her.

She pouted," Come back here."

He laughed," You come here," he said as he moved to turn on the water in the shower stall, setting it to the right temperature.

She moved towards him," Mean," she pouted.

He couldn't help but chuckle he took another step backwards away from her as he climbed into the shower stall. "I am not."

"Yes you are," she pouted as she moved towards him again," you won't stay still!"

He grinned," Come here, I promise not to move anymore," he said holding his hand out to her.

She gave him a weary look," How do I know you won't?"

"Promise baby."

"Better not," she said as she finally joined him in the shower, pulling the door shut behind her.

His right hand slid around her waist and the other hand went to her leg pulling her body towards his as his lips captured hers. He kissed her softly but with so much passion and want his pent up desire flowing freely. He turned so her back was against the shower wall and water came cascading down on them.

She slid a leg up his thigh as the cold checkered blue and white tiles of the shower stall wall pressed up against her back. She opened her mouth wider kissing him back as she let her tongue dart out of her mouth against his.

He opened his mouth allowing her tongue to enter letting his own brush up against hers. He loved the taste of her it was a combination that was uniquely her and it drove him crazy with desire. Just having her naked body near his made him hard. He knew she had to be wet with desire for him so not able to hold back any longer he lifted her up bringing her legs around his waist, and keeping her back pressed against the wall. He moved so he could easily enter her.

Her hands slid down the back of his neck as their tongues danced, she locked her legs around him letting out a soft moan feeling him enter her.

He sucked on her tongue as he felt her walls around him, he could tell how wet she was already. He pushed himself as far into her as he could go, before pulling out a little and pushing back as far in again, causing her walls to tighten around him. His chest was pressed up against her breasts. Heat swirled between their bodies as they steamed up the shower's glass doors.

TBC…..

( this is a long chapter,so its split up)


	2. Late For Work

Ch1. Part 2- Late For Work

She broke the kiss trailing kisses to his neck as she sucked on it softly, causing him to groan with pleasure. Each time he thrusted into her hitting her spot her walls tightened around him, he was so far deep inside of her. "Oh god Ray," she moaned in pleasure.

He smirked," You like that huh?"

"Hell yeah!" She breathed, she could feel her climax rising as she tightened around him harder.

He picked up speed his thrusts becoming faster and harder each time. His own climax starting to rise as well, it was pure amazing pleasure.

She was only seconds away from her climax, and could feel it."mmmm Ray, more," she begged.

He loved the way she begged him for more, she felt so good surrounding him right now. He could feel how close to the edge she was. With one big thrust he sent her climaxing.

She held onto his shoulders moaning with pleasure at the feelings that soared through. She reached her climax within in seconds.

Soon after Ray reached his own climax, as he held her pinned up against the shower wall. Afterwards standing there, he set her back on her feet, water still cascading down on top of them." Damn that was good," he breathed.

She smiled," Yes it was," she agreed kissing him softly.

Ray was late for work and he knew it as he all but skidded into the ER at County General.

"You're late," Abby said from where she was grabbing a chart and heading off to exam a patient.

" Traffic," Ray lied, he headed to the locker room tossing his things in his locker, and pulling on the white lab coat. Just as he made it back to the desk, a GSW victim was rolled in, he took that and got right to work. The whole morning was filled with paitents,from as anything as little to a cut as huge as GSWs and stabbings.

Ray finished up with a little boy and presented to an attending, before he went to grab another chart. On his way to the desk he ran into Neela. " Hey," he said smiling when he saw her, it had been a while since he had talked to her.

" Oh hey Ray," Neela said," how's it going?"

" Been busy. How about you?"

" Me too," Neela said.

" Oh hey listen, are you free tonight?" he asked suddenly.

" Um, yeah why?"

" I thought it would be nice to have you over for dinner."

"Tonight?" she asked a bit hesitantly.

"Yeah at my apartment."

"Sure," she said after a moment wondering if this was a good idea." Uh can I bring anything?"

" Nope. Lexi's cooking so yah everything is good to go. We'll see you around 8pm, is that good?"

" Yeah, that's great. See you then," Neela said. As she continued in the direction she was heading, she couldn't help but think about Ray.

( Ray's Apartment- Later That Night)

To Neela it felt weird being here with Ray after he was married to someone else, even though she used to be married herself. Things were just so incredibly different now she tried to relax though and have a good time. After dinner they were getting ready to have dessert.

" I'll just bring the dessert out," Lexi said as she got up, she really wasn't sure how she felt about having Neela here, but she didn't want to be rude either. She was after all still Ray's best friend.

" I'll get it," Ray offered rising," you sit," he said w/ a smile.

"Uh okay," she said uncertain as she sat back down.

Ray left the table and went into the kitchen to retrieve dessert, leaving the two women together at the table.

" The colors look nice," Neela said lamely, searching for something to talk about.

"Uh thanks," Lexi said uncomfortably. She knew that Neela and Ray used to live together.

Luckily the girls didn't have to make anymore small talk because Ray had returned with the dishes of Tiramisu, "Okay ladies dessert is served," he said as he placed a dish in front of each of the women and then placed his own in front of him. " Dig in," he said with a grin picking up his spoon and taking a bite.

After dessert Ray was in the kitchen doing the dishes, he had sent Lexi to lay down.

Neela came into the kitchen," Can I help with anything?" she asked.

" Sure, you can dry if you want," he said as he washed a plate.

She picked up a dish towel and went to stand by him," You know what I miss?" she asked.

He passed her the plate," What's that?" he asked, as he started on the next plate.

"Movie night," she replied as she dried the plate putting it in the dish stand.

He grinned ," Yeah. All the best horror movies."

She playfully groaned," Now those I don't miss."

"Oh come on, you know you do," he said as he handed her another plate. For a few minutes they worked side by side washing and drying. When the last dish was done Ray was looking at her. She looked like she belonged in his kitchen, like she had never left.

" Maybe I do," she whispered, her heart suddenly start to pound in her chest.

Ray moved closer to her," you do."

"Maybe."

"Admit it, you do." He was standing so close to her now, if he leaned just a little bit..

"Okay. I love them," she said. She wanted him to kiss her, but she knew it was wrong.

He wanted to kiss her so badly, Geeze Barnett, what is wrong with you? You're wife is laying down in your bed, and you just made love to her in the shower this morning, and now you're thinking about someone else. He knew it was wrong but he just couldn't help it. His hazel eyes deepened with desire.


	3. Friday

Friday

Neela backed up her back hitting the counter," I-I should go," she said.

" I don't want you to," he replied not taking his eyes off of her.

" I'm sorry. I need to," she said slipping past him and grabbing her coat and purse as she left.

He watched her go wanting so badly to go after her, but knew that he shouldn't. What was wrong with him? He shook his head reaching to turn the kitchen light off, and head into the bedroom.

(Friday Morning- Two Weeks Later)

Ray was grabbing coffee to go from the kitchen, when Lexi walked into the kitchen. " Morning beautiful," he said w/ a smile.

" Morning," Lexi replied grabbing a glass for juice, she looked like she hadn't gotten any sleep and was slightly pale.

"You okay?"

" Yeah," she said," just need something to eat."

"You going to work then?" he asked pouring some juice for her.

" Thanks. Yeah I'm going in," she replied sipping her juice. " When are you getting off?"

" I should be in around 11," he replied as he took a sip of his coffee," will you be okay til then?"

" Yeah. I'll probably come back and grab a bite to eat and then sleep."

"Alright. I'll try not to wake you when I get in," he promised, he leaned in kissing her softly." And try not to work too hard."

" Okay," she promised as she kissed him back.

(Starbucks- Around The Corner From County)

Samantha " Sam" Taggert stopped in the Starbucks to order a coffee.

Lexi, worked behind the counter there and saw her," Hey Sam, " she said w/a friendly smile." what can I get you today?"

Sam smiled," Hey Lexi. Uh a grande Caramel Macchiato," she said.

"Coming right up," she said turning to began preparing the drink. About a quarter of the way through making the drink she felt dizzy and stopped what she was doing.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked worried.

"Yeah. I'm fine," Lexi waved it off taking a deep breath and continued to make the drink. She poured it in the paper cup putting the lid on, she turned to ring up the drink. Before she made it to the register she passed out.

Sam quickly moved around the back of the counter, not really caring that customers weren't supposed to be on that side. She checked for a pulse before getting the help of a few EMTs who were drinking coffee nearby.

(At County)

Sam rushed in with the EMTs," 23 year old Female! Got slightly dizzy and then passed out," she said.

Ray turned," I got…." he trailed off in shock, seeing his wife laying on the gurney.

"Where's Luka? Abby? Anyone?" Sam asked wheeling the gurney into a room so they could examine her.

"All of them are tied up," Ray said when he found his voice," what happened?"


	4. Dr Daddy

Dr. Daddy

" Then it's you and me," Sam said," we have to do something," she said as she got to work.

" I can't," he said after a moment.

Sam sighed fusterated," Ray we don't have time for this!" she exclaimed.

" I can't," he said.

Sam groaned," Fine page Luka please," she said as she did what she could checking vitals and everything else.

Ray did just that he paged Luka back there, and didn't know what to do with himself after that.

" What do we have?" Luka asked as he came in putting on a new pair of gloves.

" Passed out a work, was a little dizzy," Sam said," And Ray?"

He looked at Sam," Yeah?"

" Either help or go make yourself useful."

"Okay Okay I'm gone," he said,"but I want to know what's going on."

"We'll let you know, " Luka promised.

( Several Hours Later)

Luka had sent several tests to the lab and was waiting for the results to come back, he had a pretty good idea though of what had caused Ray's wife to faint like that.

Sam was sitting with Lexi for the moment, who was awake now." How do you feel?"

"Okay I think," she said.

"You're test results should be coming back soon. Did you eat today?"

"Yeah. I had juice at home and then a muffin at work before clocking in."

"Do you get dizzy a lot at work?"

"No that was the first time."

Luka returned with test results," Well," he said," I got your test results back." He straddled a chair with the results in his hand.

"What is it?" Lexi asked.

"You're pregnant."

" What?" she asked shocked a little.

"Pregnant."

She let that information sink in but didn't know whether to be happy or sad. It wasn't exactly planned, but she had wanted kids.

"Sam & I will get outta your way and send Ray in," Luka offered.

"Um thanks," Lexi replied.

"If you need anything just ask," Sam offered as she and Luka left to find Ray.

" Did you run tests?" Ray demanded," why did she pass out?"

"She needs to have more then a muffin for breakfast," Sam said.

"She's pregnant," Luka said.

"What?" Ray asked giving them both a blank look.

"You're going to be a father. Congrats."

"Uh…thanks," Ray said, not entirely sure about this. Had they talked about wanting kids? He really couldn't remember.

"She needs to eat better," Sam warned," So take care of her."

Ray could only nod his head as not a single word could come out of his mouth. Pregnant? Wow!


	5. Movie Night

Movie Night

Lexi was discharged and sent home after Ray had the chance to talk to her. The rest of his day was pretty much the same, he practically went through his shift like a robot. The whole time though all he could think was She's Pregnant?

( Ike's)

After his shift he headed into Ike's to get something to drink. When he walked over to the bar to take a seat, he spotted Neela there.

"Hey, this seat taken?" he asked.

Neela looked up," Hey. No you can have it," she said w/a smile. Her heart was fluttering in her chest, and pounding uncontrollably. Why did she always get this way when she was near him? She took a sip from the beer bottle in front of her.

Ray ordered a beer and turned to her," You know what I was thinking?" he asked after a moment.

She looked at him," What?"

"That we need to have movie night twice a week."

"What?" she asked confused, taking another sip of her beer.

The bartender set Ray's drink in front of him. " Movie night, twice a week," Ray said, nodding a thanks to the bartender and picking up the bottle taking a drink.

"Uh…sure, we could do that. I've usually got the apartment to myself nowadays."

"Good. So how's tonight for our first Movie Night of the week?"

"Now?" she asked surprised.

"Sure. Why not? We can pick up some movies."

"Okay," Neela said. They finished a few more drinks of their beers and then left for the movie store.

(Blockbuster)

" The Grudge looks good," Ray said.

Neela groaned," No."

"Awww come on. I won't let the monster get you," he said w/a small smirk.

"That's not funny Barnett."

"Please. Come on."

"No."

"I'll be there to protect you," he said looking at her.

She looked at him her heart starting to pound again," Okay," she found herself saying. So they rented The Grudge and a few more horror movies, like most of the time.

( Neela's Apartment)

Neela hung up her jacket and put her keys on the hook, and put her purse away. " Do you want anything to drink?" she asked.

"A cold beer, didn't get to finish the other one," he said w/a grin. He hung up his jacket movies in hand went to the living room.

"Coming right up," Neela said and went into the kitchen to retrieve two cold beers.

Ray was on the sofa after having stuck the first movie into the dvd player. Neela returned with the beers handing him one," Thanks," he said.

She sat down next to him," Which one are we starting with?" she asked taking a sip of her beer.

Ray hit play ," Whatever was on top," he said with a smile," We're watching them all at some point tonight."


	6. Irresistible

Irresistible

Author's Note: This Chapter contains adult content! You've been warned!

Around the second movie, Neela was leaning against Ray as they watched the movie. He glanced over at her, it felt so perfect having her by his side." I've missed you," he said quietly.

She looked over at him," You did?" she asked softly.

"Yeah I did," he replied, he couldn't take his eyes off of her.

"I missed you too," she said as she sat up turning to look at him.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"What would you do if I kissed you?" he asked, his hazel eyes never leaving her.

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea," she said hesitantly.

" I think that's the best idea I've had all night," he murmured as he moved in closer." Neela, I want to kiss you so badly," he said. He lowered his head catching her mouth in a deep searing kiss.

Her mind was telling her to make him stop, but the rest of her was telling her to go for it. So she wrapped her arms around him kissing him back.

He kissed her long and hard,"Neela," he groaned softly wanting her so badly.

"Ray," she moaned softly.

He started to unbutton her blouse slowly, his mouth following as he laid kisses on her exposed skin.

( Ray & Lexi's apartment)

Lexi was curled up on the couch with a blanket and her favorite pillow. Gone With The Wind was playing on tv so she was watching it. She glanced at the clock wondering where Ray was. It was after eleven pm and he wasn't back yet, she knew that he couldn't still be at the hospital. She tried to pay attention to the movie, her head resting on the pillow. The phone on the end table rang, turning she reached for the cordless phone picking it up," Hello?" she said answering it.

" Hi, I just wanted to see how you were doing," Sam said from the other end.

"Oh hi!" she said surprised." I'm okay, just sitting here watching a movie."

"Awww Ray's watching a movie with you at this hour?"

"Uh, actually he's not home yet."

"What?" Sam asked surprised.

"He hasn't come home yet."

"That's impossible. I saw him leave around 11 when he finished up, I saw him head towards Ike's but he couldn't possibly still be there."

"It's okay, he probably ran into some friends and lost track of time."

"No actually it's not okay. You're pregnant and sitting home alone. When I see him I'm really going to give him a piece of my mind!"

"Sam, its okay really."

"No its not. Anyway though I called to see if you wanted to go shopping tomorrow around lunchtime."

"Shopping?"

"Yeah. You can get started on baby shopping it'll be fun."

"Sure. I'd love that."

"Great. I'll see you around 1pm."

"See you then."

( Neela's apartment)

She worked quickly to remove his clothing, while he was removing hers. Clothes were tossed haphazardly to the ground.

His hand ran up her side, as it came in contact with her skin. His mouth moved to her neck as he kissed it softly, he loved how she tasted on his tongue. He shifted so that Neela was laying on the sofa underneath him.

She wrapped her legs around his waist, she really couldn't wait any longer to feel him inside of her. She was aching for him.


	7. Sam Vs Ray

Sam VS Ray

Ray's mouth trailed kisses down the side of her neck and his mouth took her right nipple in, sucking on it softly, letting his tongue flick across it.

This caused a moan of pleasure to escape her as she arched her body towards his. One hand slid down his back, the other was tangled in his hair.

He moved and slid into her easily, she fit around him like she was made for him. His mouth found hers kissing her long and passionately, letting his tongue slip inside her mouth. He began to thrust in and out her, letting his tongue dart in and out of her mouth at the same time.

She started to move her hips against him, letting her tongue play with his.

He loved the feeling of her surrounding him, and the feeling of her body pressed up against his. He began to thrust deep inside of her, reaching for her spot.

"Mmm Ray, deeper," she begged him. She clutched his shoulders, as she continued to move her hips. She really wanted him so badly.

The deeper he went, the faster she moved her hips against him. Both of their climaxes were rising hard and fast. He sucked on her neck as he went deeper inside of her he could feel her climax rising. It took him one final deep thrust to cause her to cum. Then minutes later he reached his own climax. Their sweaty bodies were tangled together as they lay on the sofa.

(Ray & Lexi's apartment)

Around 4am Ray stumbled into the dark apartment, he ran into the edge of the coffee table. "Ouch! Dammit!" he said turning to avoid the table; he ended up knocking the lamp over, as it crashed loudly to the ground," Shit!"

Lexi had fallen asleep on the couch, but sat up when the lamp crashed to the ground. She reached for the other lamp turning it on as she looked at Ray.

It took him a moment to realize he had woken her,"Hey…what are you doing out here?" he asked puzzled.

"I was watching a movie, and fell asleep," she said." How come you're just getting home?" she asked quietly.

"I…um sorry. I ran into Brett, and we started hanging out ya know. I should have called."

"That's okay. I was just worried."

He stepped over the broken glass and moved to sit beside her on the couch." How do you feel?" he asked.

"Okay, I guess."

"You're not feeling sick yet or anything?" he asked.

"Nope, just sleepy at the moment."

He stood offering her his hand," Come on we should get you to bed then," he said.

She put her hand in his as she got up from the sofa and headed into the bedroom behind him.

(County)

The next day at one pm, Lexi walked into County and went to the desk.

Sam looked up," Hey," she said," Let me just grab my jacket and purse."

Lexi nodded," Alright. No hurry," she said as she waited.

Ray had finished up in trauma room 1 and was covered with blood, he stopped by the desk to drop off some charts of other patients. "Hey, "he said surprised to see Lexi," were you waiting for me?"

She looked up smiling," Hey. No. Sam and I are going shopping."

"Shopping?" he asked surprised," when did you two become such good friends?"

"She just called yesterday to see if I was okay, and asked if I wanted to go shopping. Would it be so bad if we became friends?"

"Um I guess not," Ray said," its just well, you two are just so different."

"Doesn't mean we can't be friends."

"Besides someone has to look out for her," Sam said returning with her jacket on and her purse.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ray demanded glaring at her.

"What do you think it means?" Sam retorted.

"Come on you two, there's no reason to fight," Lexi said wishing that they would stop.

"It better not mean that you're saying I don't look out for my wife, because I do!"

"Ray," Lexi said touching his arm," I don't think she meant it like that."

He shrugged off her touch," Yeah I fucking look out for you!" he yelled his voice rising," I put food on the table, a roof over your head!"

"If you do all that, then how could you leave her alone last night!" Sam yelled glaring at him.

Ray's eyes narrowed as he looked at Sam," My wife is none of your fucking business Samantha. Why don't you worry about your troublesome son, and your thief of a husband, instead of getting into my business!"

Neela had been looking for Ray to get his help with a trauma, and found him. She hurried over and noticed them fighting and other people watching," People are watching," she hissed.

" I don't care! I'm not letting Sam tell me what I should be doing! "Ray yelled.

"Fine then come help me, there's a trauma in room 2 we need extra hands," Neela said, grabbing his sleeve pulling him away.


	8. Caught In The Act

Caught In The Act

(Several Hours Later)

Sam had returned with Lexi to County, they had several bags in their hands, and they had also eaten lunch at this small café. "That should cover the basics without knowing the baby's sex," she said.

"Thanks," Lexi said with a smile," I wasn't looking forward to doing that alone."

"Well Ray should be doing it with you," she said," but since he seems to be MIA at the moment too."

"Last saw him heading towards the janitor's closet," Frank said from his post.

"Thanks Frank," Sam said," We need to go find him and I can give him a piece of my mind."

"No its okay," Lexi said.

"No its not!" Sam exclaimed," I don't even know why you married the loser. Come on we're going to look for him," Sam said stashing their bags and leading her new friend towards the supply closet.

(Janitor's Closet)

Ray's hands explored the region beneath Neela's top as he kissed her deeply.

"MMM Ray, what if someone catches us?" she whispered as she kissed him back.

"They're all busy right now," he mumbled between kisses. He slid his tongue into her mouth exploring it letting his tongue brush up against hers.

She let hers brush back up against his as she started to suck on it.

He broke their kiss as his mouth attached itself to her neck, as he sucked on it softly.

Sam and Lexi finally arrived at the janitor's closet and Sam pulled it open. She started to speak but then heard Lexi's gasp of surprise.

Ray's head shot up and turned to see who it was Shit! "Lex."

"Unbelievable!" Sam roared,"You have got to be the biggest asshole I've ever had the unfortunate pleasure of knowing. I have no idea why she puts up with your sorry ass."

"No one asked you!" Ray said annoyed," Get lost."

"Why would you do something like this?" Lexi finally choked out finding her voice.

"He's an ass that's why," Sam said.

"It's not….." Ray began.

"Because he never loved you!" Neela said getting sick of watching this.

Ray's head turned to look at her," Neela!" he was surprised at her behavior.

"What? You didn't or you wouldn't have been at my place last night!"

"Oh my god," Lexi whispered turning to back away from the closet, this was more then she could take. She turned to walk away quickly from the janitor's closet.

Neela started after her," Face the truth!" she called after her.

Lexi whipped around to face her," No one asked you!" she yelled angerily." You could have anyone you want, and you had to steal my husband!"

"It's not my fault he never loved you!"

"You're a bitch!"

The two women were yelling louder now as Ray and Sam neared them after having caught up to them. The yelling increased and suddenly Neela pushed Lexi.

Sam and Ray watched in horror as Lexi let out a startled scream before falling down a set of stairs.

"Neela!" Ray said," What the hell is wrong with you!"

"I-I…." Neela said.

"She's pregnant!" Sam said horrified, she glared at Neela, and then she ran down the set of stairs.


	9. You Can't Hide At County

You Can't Hide At County

When Sam couldn't wake her, she got Luka and Abby's help. They moved her to an empty trauma room and started to monitor her vital stats.

Ray couldn't fathom what had just happened, he was still trying to make sense of it all." Why would you behave the way you just did today?" he asked looking at her.

Neela looked at him, "It's the truth! Atleast I can tell it!"

"What's that supposed mean?"

"You knew she was pregnant! And you what? Just happen to fall into my bed?" she demanded angerily.

"No! You know that's not how it is!"

"I don't know anything anymore!"

"You had no right to say what you did to her! She's still my wife!"

"If you loved her so goddamn much then you wouldn't have been in my bed last night!"

"So what? I'm supposed to love only you?" he demanded." She was there for me after you walked away! You left even after I told you that you were the best friend I ever had, that I can't help how I feel about you! Who does that?" he asked getting mad.

"WHAT! You can't love us both!"

"Right now I don't know how I feel," Ray said running a hand through his hair.

(Trauma Room Four)

Lexi's body lay on the table like a rag doll, they had her hooked up to machines. They were also monitoring the baby to make sure it was okay thus far.

"He's so fucking unbelievable," Sam muttered.

"What happened?" Abby asked.

"He's sleeping with Neela!"

"What?" Luka asked surprised.

"Excuse me?" Abby said.

"Ray is sleeping with Neela!"

"Sam, that's a pretty big accusation," Luka said after after a moment.

"Neela admitted it!"


	10. Secrets

Secrets

Ray went to find where they had taken Lexi, but he felt everyone else's eyes on him. Shit! He was pretty sure that most of County knew by now. He found Sam with Luka and Abby in Trauma Four.

"How is she?" he demanded.

Sam narrowed her eyes at him," What are you doing here?"

"I'm worried okay?" he snapped," She's my wife."

"Whatever," Sam said turning to leave," I'll be back later."

He looked at Luka and Abby," Someone please tell me."

"She's gonna go up to CT, we need to run some tests, since she hasn't woken up yet. But her vitals are looking good and the baby looks okay too, but we aren't really sure yet," Luka said.

Neela was looking for Ray, she felt bad for saying the things that she did. She probably should have kept her mouth shut, and let Ray be the one to tell his wife. She hadn't meant to push the other woman down the stairs. She needed to find Ray and apologize.

(Ray & Neela)

After Lexi was taken up for a CT, Ray was headed for the lounge; he needed something to keep his mind off of things.

Neela found him," Ray?" she said.

He looked up and sighed softly," I don't want to fight about this anymore with you," he said.

"I didn't come to fight," she said quietly," Can we talk?"

"Um sure," he said, as they headed together into the lounge.

"I wanted to apologize," she said quietly," and I wanted you to know, I didn't mean to push her. I swear."

"I wish you wouldn't have said anything to her," he said quietly," you should have given me a chance to talk to her. I want to be with you Neela, I really do. But you should have given me a chance to say something. Would you have liked it if I told Michael that you never loved him?"

"No," she said quietly," I know I was wrong and I'm sorry. But you weren't being fair either; you knew she was pregnant didn't you?"

"I did," he said quietly," I'm sorry. I can't help how I feel about you Neela, I really can't."

She sighed softly," What are we going to do?"

"I'm really not sure yet."

"Is she okay?" she asked hesitantly.

"They have to run some tests."

(Several Hours Later)

They had learned that Lexi was in coma, but her brain was still active and there was brain activity going on which was a good sign. They were keeping her here at County and monitoring her constantly.

(Days Later)

As the days went by they waited for her to come out of the coma. Sam checked on her every day whenever Ray wasn't around.

"I know I've said this before," Sam said as she talked, and tucked the sheets around Lexi," but I'm sorry you had to find out that way, it wasn't fair at all. I sort of don't blame you for not wanting to come back to the real world," she continued," But you've got this tiny little life trying to grow inside of you. You need to wake up for him or her, they're going to need you," she said gently.

(Ray's apartment)

Ray was pouring himself a mug of coffee; he was getting ready to go into work. He felt weird like everyone was always looking at him and blaming him. He actually had plans with Neela tonight. No matter what he did, he couldn't forget her.

Suddenly there was a knock on his front door, he frowned wondering who that could be. He went to the door pulling it open. Standing on the other side was his half brother- Ryan and Lexi's sister- Lily. "Hey guys," he said surprised. "What are you two doing here?"

"We made plans to come visit you guys like months ago," Ryan reminded his older brother.

"Yeah," Lily said," Where's Lex at? I left her a voicemail a few days ago. "

Ray sighed softly," There's a lot you two don't know," he said, stepping aside to let the teens in.


	11. Hospital Visit

Hospital Visit

Lily narrowed her eyes at Ray," Where's my sister, I want to talk to her."

"I think you need to sit down," Ray said. He and Lily had butted heads on more then one occasion when it came to Lexi, including the morning of the wedding. For a seventeen year old girl she was pretty stubborn and strong willed and didn't stop til she had accomplished what she started.

"Why do you always have to pick on him?" Ryan demanded. Ryan was Ray's half brother, Ray's dad had remarried years ago after leaving Ray and his mother.

"Who asked you?" Lily said crossly," I was talking to Ray."

"Just sit down please, and both of you stop," Ray all but begged. He pointed to the couch in hopes they would stop arguing and sit down.

The two Seventeen year olds sat down on the couch unfortunately near each other. Ray was still standing; he put his mug on a coaster." Lexi isn't here at the moment," he said realizing how stupid that sounded seeing as they could see that she wasn't.

"Yeah I can see that," Lily retorted.

"What I mean is…." Ray paused taking a deep breath trying to gather his thoughts. How was he gonna say this? He ran a hand through his hair," She's in the hospital right now," he said quietly.

Lily jumped off the couch," WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY SISTER!" she yelled hitting Ray with her small fists.

"Lily," Ray said trying to get her to stop," I didn't…."

"IT HAD TO BE YOU! WHO ELSE WOULD IT BE? YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S WITH HER EVERYDAY AND THE ONE WHO'S SUPPOSED TO PROTECT HER!" She continued to beat him with her fists.

Ryan had jumped up and grabbed Lily's arms to keep her from hitting Ray anymore," Lily, let him talk. He wouldn't hurt your sister on purpose."

"No! I'm leaving, I want to go to the hospital and see her!"

"Uh Lily, before you do that," Ray said rubbing his arm where she had been hitting him, there would be black and blue bruises everywhere. "I need to tell you something."

"You've said enough!"

(Neela's Apartment)

It had been a couple weeks since the night that Ray had come over. Neela was supposed to go into work today and was also supposed to have another movie night with Ray. However she wasn't feeling well. She would probably cancel on Ray and stay in, she felt like she was coming down with the flu. She had only eaten some cereal a few minutes ago and already felt sick again, she ran into the bathroom.

(Ray & Lexi's Apartment)

"Okay, Okay," Ray said quietly." I'm going to the hospital, I have to be at work. You two can come…you can see her," he said. He knew he should say something about her being in a coma and being pregnant, but blurting it out wasn't the answer. He grabbed his stuff and led the two of them out of the apartment, so they could catch the train and get to County.

(County)

Lily entered ahead of the Barnett brothers, and didn't stop. She went straight up to the desk where Sam was talking to Clemente and Luka. "Where's my sister?" she demanded once she got up there.

"Who's your sister?" Clemente asked.

Ray caught up to her ," Sorry guys. This is my sister in law- Lily," he said," and this is my brother- Ryan. She just wants to visit with Lexi."

"I'll take her in," Sam said, still not happy with Ray and his behaviour.

"Um actually, I kindda needed to speak to Lily first. I can take her," Ray said.

Lily had her arms crossed over her chest," There's nothing more you could possibly say to me."

"Oh you must have heard about Neela," Sam said," I don't blame you for not wanting to hear anything else he has to say."

Ray's face went white and he wished the floor would open up and swallow him already.

"About who?" Lily asked her eyes narrowing at Ray, her green eyes turned a darker shade.

"Neela? You're ex-roommate?" Ryan asked.

"Ryan, go get something to eat or something here," Ray said handing him a ten dollar bill," Cafeteria's that way," he turned his brother in that direction. " Lily, look just walk with me to Lex's room and we can talk okay?"

"Fine. You get five minutes go," Lily ordered, as the two of them started walking together.

"Lexi's pregnant," Ray began as they started walking," and um well she took a fall," he said.

"What kind of fall?" Lily demanded.

"Down the stairs," Ray said quietly," She's in a coma."

"WHAT! HOW COULD YOU LET THAT HAPPEN!"

"I…uh didn't exactly let it, it was an accident."

"You better not have pushed her down them!"

"I didn't. I would never," he said as they came to Lexi's room," She's in there," he said quietly.

Lily walked into the room, trying to take in all that information. She really couldn't figure out how things had gotten that out of hand in a few days.

(Neela)

Neela was late for work because she stopped at the drugstore on the way there. She stashed the brown paper sack in her locker, she would deal with that later. On her way towards the entrance to the ER, she ran into Ray."Oh good," she said," I needed to talk to you."

Ray looked at her," What's wrong?" he asked.

"I am going to have to back out of tonight, I'm really not feeling so well," Neela said.

"Are you coming down with something?" Ray asked worried.

"Yeah. So sorry," she said.

"That's okay," Ray said," My brother's in town anyway."

"You have a brother?" she asked surprised.

"Well half brother really, but yeah."

(Several Hours Later)

Ray had come to check on Lexi and found Lily's head resting on the edge of the mattress, she was asleep. Ryan found him in the doorway.

"Hey," Ryan said," what happened?" he asked quietly nodding in the direction of Lexi.

Ray sighed," I don't want to talk about what happened," he said. " It's complicated okay?"

"Fine. Just asking."


	12. Neela's Decision

Neela's Decision

(A few weeks later)

Ray had starting spending every day and every night at the hospital, he was feeling beyond guilty and it was starting to eat him up inside. He was at the hospital when he was working and when he wasn't working. Ryan and Lily were still around, but for the most part they were at the apartment when Lily wasn't at the hospital with Lexi.

"Lexi," Ray said quietly from her bedside." This is all my fault. I…somehow sorry doesn't really seem to be appropriate, but its all I can come up with at the moment. I don't want to loose you, and our baby. I wouldn't be able to handle that Lex, you have to come back." He buried his face in his hands, as much as he willed the tears not to come they did. Why had he done this? How could he have done this?

He couldn't watch her like this lying like a rag doll hooked up to all these machines; even though he probably deserved to suffer more then he was right now. He got up leaving her room, and going to get ready for his shift.

(Neela & Ray)

Neela was just getting off a shift and ran into Ray, she had been avoiding him and had changed all her shifts. She knew that he would find out soon enough as she had told Abby already." Hi," she said hesitantly after a moment.

"Neela," Ray said surprised, it seemed as though it had been forever since he had seen her.

"Um…how have you been?" she asked.

"Okay, you?"

"There's actually something I needed to tell you," she said not sure how she was going to say this.

"What is it?"

"I-I found out why I've been so sick."

He looked at her waiting for her to speak, this was obviously more then the flu. "It wasn't the flu?" he asked after awhile.

"N-no not exactly."

"Alright. So what was it?"

"I'm pregnant," she said quietly.

"You're what?" he choked out.

"Pregnant."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He ran a hand through his hair," Well don't worry you won't be alone," he finally said.

"Ray, you have a pregnant wife. I can't do this anymore, we never should have started. If I had known she was pregnant I never would have allowed things to go so far."

"I never meant for things to get so complicated," he said quietly.

"I think it would be best if we went our separate ways," Neela said.

"You're just going to cut me out of my child's life? Neela that's not fair."

"Life isn't fair Ray, though I can't justify cutting you out of his or her life, so I will allow you to see him or her and spend time with him or her."

What could he say to that? She had pretty much already decided and he was just supposed to go along with it.


	13. Please Give Me Some Answers

Please Give Me Some Answers

(Ray)

For the rest of the day all Ray could think about was both of them were pregnant. How had this happened? He wished he could just walk out that door and disappear.

(Ray's Apartment)

Lily was curled up in the sofa chair with the latest copy of Cosmopolitan Magazine.

Ryan was laying on the sofa flipping through the channels til he landed on MTV. He was beyond bored and was itching to get out of the apartment." Hey Lil' lets go do something fun," he suggested.

"Its Lily," she said, she didn't let anyone call her Lil', the only nickname she had was Li, and only her sister called her that.

"Okay Lil-Ly," he said exaggerating the name." Let's go do something fun."

"What do you want to do?" she asked in a bored tone, as she flipped the page of her magazine.

"I want to go to a party."

"There aren't any parties during the day," she said logically.

"I know, but I want to do something til all the parties get started."

"Like what?"

"I don't know anything. Starbucks, something. The movies. Something outside," he said waving in the direction of the doors.

"Alright let's go," she said closing the magazine tossing it onto the coffee table. She grabbed some cash from her purse putting it in her pocket.

Ryan grabbed his wallet and the keys to the

apartment," Ladies first," he said as he held the apartment door open for her.

(Neela)

She grabbed some water after cleaning up after a trauma; she was feeling a little bit dizzy. She sat down to drink her water. What was she gonna do? There was no way that she could have a baby and raise it on her own. She buried her face in her hands. She took a deep breath to calm herself down.

Abby was walking by but stopped when she saw her friend,"Neela, what's wrong?" she asked sitting by her.

"I told Ray," she said quietly.

"What did he say?"

"He wants to help with this baby, but I can't let him."

"Why not?"

"He's married Abby. His wife is expecting, how do you think it'll look?"

"At this point its done. He should be responsible for something."

"So what? Child Support? Seeing his or her son on weekends? How fair is that?" Neela asked.

"Life's not always fair Neela," Abby said, using the same words that Neela had said to Ray.

(Diner)

Ryan and Lily were at a small diner to get something to eat.

"Lil, you haven't said anything to Ray since you yelled at him," Ryan said after a moment after they had placed their orders.

"Lily," she said correcting him," and there isn't anything to say."

"It wasn't his fault," Ryan said playing with sugar packets.

"Yes it is. He could have done something to make sure that she was okay," she snapped."To prevent her fall, though there's more to it then that. She couldn't have just fallen down the stairs."

"So what? Are you saying he pushed her?"

"I don't know."

"He wouldn't do that! How can you say that?" Ryan couldn't believe Lily was saying the things she was about Ray.


	14. Touched By An Angel

Touched By An Angel

Ryan threw some cash down on the table at the diner for the food they hadn't gotten yet," We'll ask him come on let's go," he said standing up.

"What?" Lily asked baffled as she looked at him.

"We'll just ask Ray, come on," he said," Hurry up already."

Lily got up," You want to go to the hospital and ask him? He's at work."

"I don't care. You're wrong and I know it," he said, turning and walking out.

"No I'm not wrong," she said following him," I know there is more to the story."

"He didn't push her."

"I didn't say he did. I said there was more and that I didn't know, but he's responsible."

"You're unbelievable," he snapped as they caught a taxi to County.

(County)

Ryan walked into County with Lily trailing behind him," What makes you think he'll even tell us," Lily demanded.

He whipped around to face her," He might not tell you, you're a snotty little stuck up bitch, but I'm his brother and he'll tell me," he said.

Her mouth fell open is shock," I am not!"

"Yes you are," he said and went to the desk," Where's Ray?" he asked.

Sam looked up," He's with a patient, he should be out in a few," she said.

"Thank you."

(Ray/Ryan & Lily)

Ray came out dropping the chart at the desk, startled to see Ryan and Lily." Hey guys, what are you doing here?" he asked.

"We need to talk to you," Ryan said.

"Okay," he said and led them to an empty room," What's up?"

"Tell little miss stuck up bitch, that you didn't push Lexi down the stairs," Ryan said.

Lily glared at him," I didn't say he pushed her! I said he's responsible!"

"Do you really think I would push her?" Ray asked quietly. "I can't believe you would think that."

"All I said was that you were responsible," Lily said.

"Oh shut up already!" Ryan said , "Someone should have pushed you down some stairs," he mumbled.

"Stop it both of you," Ray said," I didn't push her, she fell alright. It was an accident that never should have happened."

Lily glared at him," So you didn't do anything then? You didn't try to stop it from happening?"

"I didn't get to her in time, and I feel horrible."

"Unbelievable," Lily snapped shaking her head," I'm sick of the excuses. "

"When she wakes up you can ask yourself," Ray said," I have work to do," he said turning to walk away.

(Later That Night)

Ryan went to a party and left Lily at the apartment, he didn't really care. He was pretty mad at her for saying that Ray had anything to do with Lexi's accident.

" Yo Ry!" a voice called out.

Ryan looked up," Hey Nathan," he said.

"Took you long enough to get here," he said handing him a beer.

Ryan popped the top of it taking a swig," Yeah sorry. Was fighting with Lil."

"Dude, she's hott! Is she single?" Nathan asked taking a swig from his own can of beer.

"You wouldn't want her, she's a lying bitch," he said.

"Damn, what did she do to you?"

"Long story. I've had a long freakin' day."

"I got something that'll take that edge off."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, follow me," he said leading Ryan away from the masses of dancing bodies and loud music.

(County)

Ray had fallen asleep in the lounge after his shift, he was exhausted. However his sleep wasn't peaceful, he kept seeing a replay of the accident in his head. Lexi's scream sounded so real it caused him to bolt up straight. His heart was hammering in his chest and he was sweating, he tried to breath.

Getting up he walked down the hall and into Lexi's room, and sat by her bed. "Lily and Ryan are fighting," he said as he spoke to her. "They used to get along, but Lily is trying to protect you and Ryan is defending me. Because Lily is trying to protect you from me," he continued, running a hand through his spikey locks. "When did things get so turned upside down? I feel worthless and I don't deserve you, but I'm going to be selfish, I want you to wake up," he said as a tear slid down his cheek," I thought I knew what I wanted, but right now all I want is for you to wake up, even if you hate me for the rest of my life." He laid his head on the bed near her hand and that's how he fell asleep.

(A Few Months Later)

Ray had slept by Lexi's bedside every night now, and willed her to wake up. His head rested by her arm he was still asleep.

Her arm moved causing him to lift his head sleepily and then her eyes fluttered open slowly.

"Lex," he whispered. He shot up out of the chair and went to get Luka and Abby and Sam. They checked her out to make sure she was okay and well.

Sam gave her some water, letting her sip it through a straw," We're glad to have you back," she said, setting the cup aside.

"Thanks," Lexi said her voice a bit groggy.

"Oh god Lex," Ray said.

"Get out," Lexi said she couldn't stand the sight of him.

"Baby please."

"I said get out!" she finally yelled.

"Ray, it might be best to let her be for now," Luka said.


	15. Late Night

Late Night

(The Party)

Ryan was having a good time at the party; he was dancing with a really cute girl.

He didn't bother checking the time or watching the clock, he wasn't worried about going home anytime soon.

(County)

Ray left quietly he knew he deserved to be kicked out, but he still at least wanted to talk to her. This was not how things were supposed to be. Neela wasn't talking to him and neither was Lexi. How had things gotten so screwy? He tried to stop thinking about that and threw himself into work. It was the only thing at the moment that would keep him from thinking about everything.

(Lexi's room)

Sam straightened her pillows," How are you feeling?" she asked gently.

"Like hell," Lexi muttered quietly, all she felt like doing was crying, long and hard.

"I wish I could say something that would make things better, but I really don't have anything that will," she apologized.

"It's not your fault. It's mine."

"Absolutely not! Don't you dare say that again, he's an ass for treating you this way."

She sighed quietly," I should have known."

"What do you mean?"

"His heart was broken when we met and I should have guessed, I should have seen this coming."

"That does not excuse his behaviour in any way what so ever."

(After Mid-night)

Lily had fallen asleep on the couch in the living room while reading her Cosmo.

Ray had come home to check on things after his shift, he had left the two of them home way too long. He saw Lily asleep and saw that Ryan wasn't back yet. He grabbed a bottle of cold beer taking a long drink. He went into his room to change for bed.

Ryan stumbled into Ray's apartment tripping over something and running into the edge of the coffee table," Shit!" he mumbled.

Lily woke up with a start," So graceful," she said shaking her head as she got up and headed over the air mattress to sleep there.

Ray came out of the bedroom," Watch broken?" he demanded looking at his brother.

"Uh sorry?" Ryan ventured, who was both drunk and high.

"We'll talk in the morning," Ray said," and believe me I have a lot I plan on saying. Go to bed," he said. He couldn't believe Ryan was not only drunk but also high. He turned heading back into his room.

(Next Morning)

"Unbelievable Ry, seriously Unbelievable," Ray said shaking his head." Did you think I wouldn't notice or something?"

"No… I was just I wasn't thinking, I don't know. I needed something to stay calm. What's the big deal?" Ryan said getting annoyed.

"What's the big deal!" Ray yelled," the big deal is that it's dangerous! What if you got in a car and drove? What is you Overdosed? Huh?" he demanded.

"I didn't okay!" Ryan snapped before storming out of the apartment.

(County)

By the time that Ray went into work he was beyond pissed off. He pulled on his white lab coat slamming his locker shut, causing the whole thing to shake. He really felt like breaking something in half or throwing it across the room. As he left he spotted Neela and knew he had to talk to her. He caught up to her," Hey Neela!" he said.

She turned her head and saw him," Hey Ray," she said after a moment.

He had his hands in his pockets," Uh…so how are you doing?" he asked quietly.

"I'm okay. Tired mostly, how about you?"

"Alright. Uh listen can we talk?"

"Actually, I have a ton of things that I need to do."

"It won't take long."

"Alright. I'm listening," she said.


	16. Pouring Out Your Feelings

Pouring Out Your Feelings.

Ray took a deep breath a little unsure of how to begin, of what to say.

He was feeling so many things right now and just didn't know how to express his feelings," Neela," he said softly.

She looked at him and patiently waited for him to continue speaking.

"I can't stop thinking about you," he said softly," I just can't, you can tell me to go away. You can yell at me. You can slam doors in my face. You can avoid me. You can change your shifts so you never see, but I won't go away Neela. "

"Ray," Neela said quietly," You're married. I won't be your mistress or whatever."

"I'm not asking you to be my mistress."

"So what exactly are you asking me?"

"I want to be with you."

"Well until you sort out what you have with your wife, like after you're divorced, we can talk about it," Neela said as she turned to walk away.

(Lexi's Room)

Lily was sitting by her sister's bed and visiting with her," Are you okay?" she asked her sister worriedly.

"Yeah, as okay as I can be," she replied.

"He did something didn't he?"

"Can we not get into that right now, I'd rather not think about what he did," she said.

"So he did do something?"

Lexi sighed," Fine. Yes he did something."

"What did he do?"

"Can we just leave it at he hurt me."

"Fine. But I don't like him."


	17. Not So Happy Homecoming

Not So Happy Homecoming

(The Following Friday)

Lexi was finally released from the hospital, and Ray was off that day so he took her home. She was sitting in the passenger seat staring out the window.

"Do you feel okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she said.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

When they finally got to their apartment she was about half way through her pregnancy at this point, so she was a little bigger. She pulled herself out of the car to head into the apartment building.

They took the elevator up to their floor," Baby?"

"What?"

"I never meant to hurt you."

"Well congratulations you did," she said.

"I would never intentionally hurt you," he said quietly," It's just I never realized that I still loved Neela. I didn't want things to turn out this way you have to believe me." The elevator reached their floor and dinged the doors sliding open.

She stepped off first," So what am I supposed to be okay with that? Am I supposed to congratulate you for realizing you married the wrong person?" she snapped.

He ran to catch up with her unlocking their apartment door," No. I didn't marry the wrong person. How can you say that?" he asked, as he let her into the apartment first.

She turned around to face him," Because you're standing there telling me you love Neela." Neither of them were aware that both Ryan and Lily were there watching and listening.

"Listen to me for a second please," he pleaded with her." I married you because I loved you. You were there when I hit rock bottom. Things were so bad for me, I never thought I'd be able to overcome that. I never expected for my feelings for Neela to resurface."

(Ryan and Lily)

Lily was about ready to make her presence be known and hit Ray, but Ryan grabbed her arm," We shouldn't be listening to them fight," he said quietly.

"I don't care. You're brother is a jerk, I can't believe him," she hissed.

"Not our fight, come one lets stay out of earshot and let them resolve this."

"He's in love with another woman, and you think this can be resolved?" she demanded.

"Yes."


	18. What Now?

What Now

*Note: I haven't written in I dunno how long, but I want to see if I can finish this story or atleast wrap it up in some way.

Recap: Last time in Breaking His Vows Ray was dealing with the consequences of hurting his pregnant wife by sleeping with Neela.

Neela finding out that she was pregnant too and his brother- Ryan, and his sister in law- Lily.

( Ray & Lexi's Apartment)

~ *~ Ray & Lexi ~ *~

" I don't want to hear anymore I think you've said more than enough and made yourself pretty clear," Lexi said, fighting the urge to cry. The last thing in the world she wanted to do right now was cry in front of Ray.

" Baby please if you'd just listen to me, I just," Ray said, though everything that he could possibly say didn't sound like it would sound right if he spoke it out loud.

" What Ray? You love us both. You never meant for me to find out. It'll be okay. You want to be in our child's life. Which of those is it? Or is it all of those? I mean I don't even know what you expect to me say to you right now.

Do you know how much you hurt me?"

A sick feeling took over him as he could only imagine the kind of pain he was putting her through even as he spoke.

Would things have been different if he had never loved Neela at all? Or had he been fooling himself when he got involved with Lexi and then finally married her?

"I-I don't know. I've never been where you are," he said quietly.

" I really want to say I hope someday that you are where I am. That you are in the position where someone hurts you deeply. Where your heart is breaking because all you've done is loved that person, taken care of that person, been there for them through their darkest and their roughest hours,"she said. " I might not be something special to you because I'm plain, I'm ordinary, I work at Starbucks but I am human and that means I have feelings."

"No! Why would you say that? I've never said you weren't special, or looked down on you because you work at Starbucks."

" Some things aren't enough for some people. I am what I am Ray and if that's not enough for you then you did marry the wrong person."

~*~ Lily & Ryan ~ *~

The two teens had still been listening to everything that their older siblings each said, even though they both knew that they shouldn't be listening to this conversation at all.

" Maybe we shouldn't be listening,"Lily said softly after a moment, even though she was still very mad about everything.

"No we definitely shouldn't, both of them will kill us if they know we've been listening up until now," Ryan whispered," come on maybe we can sneak out and find something fun to do."

" I guess."

Ryan watched from his spot to see if there was a way to slip past the fighting couple, because they were still standing in the living room of the apartment. "They'd see if we went out there."

" Well how else do you propose we get out of here?"

" Think they'll move anytime soon?"

" I dunno, maybe."

~ *~ Ray & Lexi ~ *~

" How did we get here?" Ray asked looking at her,"how did things end up like this between us? Of all the people in the world-"

" Don't do that," Lexi said cutting him off.

" Do what?"

" Stand there and wonder how, because you know and I know you know. I can see if on your face."

" Just because my feelings resurfaced doesn't mean its been this way forever," he said. " I never in a million years would have proposed to someone else if I was in love with someone else."

" Well you are, you were, you have been." This was definitely not the homecoming that she had in mind after being in a coma for a long time. What she wanted was to lay down and forget it all.

" Well then what now? I mean Neela's pregnant, you're pregnant."

Lexi's face went white as she looked at Ray, surely she had just heard that wrong.

Was he serious! In this already complicated status of their marriage now, there was this too!

"You have got to be kidding me!"

Oh shit! He realized that she hadn't known about Neela because he hadn't told her everything, she had only just found out about the affair before everything else that had happened.

"I'm sorry," he said." I.. . . that might not have been the best way to tell you."

" No," she said her voice turning cold," definitely not the best way at all. I just got home. I'm tired. I don't want to be here. I'm nearly five months pregnant. I'm already having to stand here and deal with things, with the fact that you're in love with someone else but married to me. That's not normal in my book, and I really don't want to discuss anything more tonight."

" Alright that's fair, but please just don't make any rash decisions or do anything stupid. No matter what happens between us, what I felt for you was real. I love you, I married you. Our unborn child shouldn't be punished for my mistakes for my poor judgment."

" Regardless of the fact you have as of recently treated me poorly, leaving me home alone while I'm pregnant, cheating on me. This child is my everything as for you and us I won't decide right this second, but nothing you can say or do is going to change things now. It won't take the hurt away," she said before turning to walk into their bedroom.

Ray ran a hand through his hair trying to come up with something anything to atleast show her that he still cared." Baby," he said as he followed her to their bedroom.

She was standing at the chest of drawers and pulled out a pair of comfortable pjs and turned to look at him.

" I said I was done for tonight Ray, all I want is to get some sleep."

" I know…its just I mean can I get you anything? Do you need anything? You haven't said how you're feeling."

" That's because I'm hurt and I'm trying very hard to keep my emotions under control."

" Right stress is the last thing you need."

" Good night," she said simply as she headed into the bathroom to change clothes for bed.

~ *~ Lily & Ryan ~ * ~

" Now is the time to make our escape," Ryan whispered once he saw Lexi and his brother head into the bedroom. Quickly he moved for the door opening it quietly so it wouldn't make any type of noise and ushered Lily out of the apartment silently closing the door. The two took off towards the bank of elevators and pushed the down button to go down to the lobby.

As soon as the elevator doors slid open they stepped on and pushed the button for lobby riding the elevator all the way down.

~*~ Ray & Lexi ~ *~

Ray knew that if Ryan hadn't been sleeping on the couch, and Lily in the spare room that Lexi more than probably would have told him to sleep on the couch tonight.

Not wanting to upset her anymore than she already was he headed out of the bedroom and towards the living room moving across the floor to the fire escape and climbing out onto it and sitting there.

What was he supposed to do? He did want to be with Neela, and he had meant that when he told her that. He also did love Lexi and everything he said to her tonight and before was all true. She had been there for him, she was his wife, he wanted to be there for his kids both of them. Only the question What Now? Ran through his mind.

Did he stay married and keep true to his wedding vows, the ones he was already breaking? Did he file for divorce because inevitably Lexi would never forgive him for breaking her heart and ruining their marriage? Did he marry Neela once his divorce was final if he got divorced?

No answers seemed to be coming to him atleast nothing that seemed right or fair to either woman if there was even a chance of being fair to either now.


End file.
